Deep Thoughts From an Insomniac Mom

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Deep Thoughts From an Insomniac Mom | Denver Metro Moms Blog

Oh crap, sheโ€™s awake. Which one is that? I think itโ€™s the four-year-old. Iโ€™m just going to lay here and hope he gets up with her.

Okay good. Sheโ€™ll go back to sleep, now Iโ€™ll go back to sleep. I wonโ€™t look at the clock. I will not look at the clock.

Heโ€™s already snoring.

I kind of have to pee.

Iโ€™m definitely not getting up to pee or Iโ€™ll never be able to go back to sleep.

Iโ€™ll turn over.

*looks at the clock. Itโ€™s 3:09.

My head itches. Crap I forgot about that lice email from school. What if the girls have lice. Oh crap what if I have lice? OMG, my crotch itches. What if my lice moved to my crotch? Isnโ€™t that basically crabs? How do I explain that my four-year-old gave me crabs?

I kind of have to pee. I should check for crabs.

*pees, no crabs detected.

Iโ€™m hungry. Iโ€™m definitely having a protein shake for breakfast. Definitely. And working out tomorrow. For sure.

But biscuits sound good.

I need to cook more. Iโ€™m going to do some recipe searching tomorrow. I will not look at my phone right now. If I look at my phone, Iโ€™ll never go to sleep.

*scrolls facebook for 30 minutes.

Itโ€™s 4:10. If I go to sleep now, Iโ€™ll have two good hours. Okay, Iโ€™m definitely going to sleep now. Deep breaths.

I kind of have to pee again.

I should start doing yoga before bed. It would help me sleep. I should start doing yoga all the time. Deep breaths.

I hate yoga. Itโ€™s so boring.

I should get the girls in yoga though. Or another activity. Theyโ€™re on the wait list for that gymnastics class. Or swim lessons. Definitely swim lessons. They need to know how to swim. And they have those cute swimsuits. I hope itโ€™s warm tomorrow. What am I going to wear to that brunch for my mom? I have no clothes. I hate everything I own.

*scrolls the web for 30 minutes.

Itโ€™s 4:45. If I go to sleep now Iโ€™ll get at least 1.5 hours. Minimum.

I wonder if we have any coffee. Iโ€™m going to need coffee tomorrow. Lots of coffee. But I think weโ€™re almost out. I need to go to the grocery store. I should make a list. No more phone right now though. No more phone. Go to sleep!

Turns over.

Turns over.

Turns over.

Turns over.

6:30 am: โ€œMama. Mama Iโ€™m awake. Mama Iโ€™m awaaaaaaakeeeโ€ฆโ€

And scene.

Do you have trouble turning your brain off during the night to sleep? What are your insomniac mom deep thoughts? Share your story with us.

3 COMMENTS

  1. sorry to hear of your sleep woes. Yoga really does make sleep soooo much better. Too bad you had a boring experience with it. I could show you a more fun way to approach it if you want. I am a 20 year teacher.

  2. You crack me up Jeni!!! We are in the teething stage right now and sleep is very low. I guess I should get used to it.

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