No Idea What You’re Doing? It’s Okay, Mama


It’s been one of those days. Technically it’s been about 4 of those days in a row and I’m going to be honest with y’all: I feel like I’m drowning a little bit. I’ve said no approximately 715 times today and poured myself a glass of wine before I could even clean up after bedtime.. it’s getting dire. A hundred BBQs for the holiday weekend, plus later bedtimes, because it’s just so darn nice outside, have us in a serious rut over here. I have no idea how to get out of this rut . . . and that’s okay.

And maybe you’re not feeling this way today, but every mom in the world has bad days and bad weeks, and in today’s society I think we forget that it’s NORMAL! Hell, I’m a firm believer that even though bad days are hard, they actually mean that you’re doing something right. If you are struggling in any way shape or form, it’s because you care. You cared that your baby was screaming at 2 am, so you got up to comfort him and now you’re exhausted. You care that your toddler is acting like a mini terrorist and you pray to God you’re doing the right stuff to nip it in the bud.

So I have just a few friendly reminders for all of you, because gluten free or not, private schooled or public schooled, organic everything or fruit snacks on the reg, we are all just doing the best we can as moms.

It’s okay to feel like you have no idea what you’re doing in motherhood. Don’t be fooled, we’re all just faking it.

It’s okay to be too exhausted to put the pile of laundry away before you go to bed.

It’s okay to threaten to call Santa in July (may or may not have done this today).

It’s okay to feel guilty that the dog didn’t get out for a walk sometimes.

It’s okay to feel mommed out. Touched out. WORN out. Amiright?

It’s okay to not agree with your mom sometimes. Shoot, it’s okay to not agree with your spouse sometimes.

It’s okay to feel like you’re failing at potty training.

It’s okay to use dry shampoo for days and days on end, instead of getting up early enough to wash your hair.

It’s okay to feel like you don’t even know where to start in decorating a new big kid room to make it Pinterest perfect.

It’s okay to wish you had a leash for your toddler (this was me for the first time ever today).

It’s okay to be the only person disciplining your child in public.

It’s okay to feel like you just can’t watch the news some days because it’s too sad.

It’s okay to have your feelings hurt if it all of a sudden feels like your group of friends doesn’t like you very much anymore. 

It’s okay to sprint out the door without looking back when the babysitter shows up and feel zero percent guilty about it.

It’s okay to sometimes just pray because you feel like the only person you can talk to is God.

It’s okay to realize the night before preschool that you forgot to go to the supermarket, and have no lunch ideas. So, instead of a fruit and a veggie, you have to send your kid to school with two servings of apples in his lunch instead of something fancier.

It’s okay to have to make a reminder for Siri anytime you think of something because there is No. Way. You would remember on your own at a later time.

It’s okay to cancel plans and sit at home and do absolutely nothing. It’s called self care and it’s incredible once in a while.

It’s okay to call your best friend in Kansas to ask her something silly like “are jean skirts really back in style, circa 1990?” Because you’ve been too busy parenting in a t-shirt and jeans to keep up with the fashion trends. And for those of you wondering…. turns out that they ARE back in style. Who knew.

It’s okay to feel like “mean mommy” once in a while. (My child tells me when he thinks I am, which is a sweet added perk).

It’s okay to really want another baby, but sometimes just be too exhausted from life to want to get it on.

It’s okay to have different political, religious, and parenting views than the people around you.

Its okay (though lets be real.. it suckssss) to put your fifth load of laundry in the wash at 9 pm because your kid pooped in his nighttime diaper and then put his hand in it… then put said hand all over his jammers, sheets, and comforter.

It’s okay to take the monitor onto the back porch and close the door to the house so you can’t hear the bedtime protest happening upstairs (me currently).

I see you. And you may not feel like it, but you are NAILING it. And those little people that you’re raising, you’re the center of their whole universe and they have no idea if you’re messing up! So, even if they just sprinted away from you full speed at a food truck festival in a crowded park, I promise that they love you so much it hurts. Keep on keepin’ on mamma… even when the mommin’ is hard and you feel invisible.

As a mom, as a wife, as a daughter, sister, friend, hell, just as a human, I see you. You look great. You’re doing great… and whoa… you even washed your hair today? I can’t even tell that you feel like you have no idea what you’re doing! Congrats!

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Raised in a small town in rural Kansas, Jessica moved back to her birth state of Colorado nearly a decade ago. After graduating college with a degree in Accounting, she specialized in Corporate Tax Accountant consulting years and simultaneously danced in the NBA as a Denver Nuggets Dancer from 2008-2012. She now works as a board certified Realtor® and is more than thankful to have a career that allows her the flexibility to work from home and spend time with her 19 month old son. In addition to being a wife, mamma and Realtor, she and her husband flip houses professionally in the Denver metro area. She lives in Castle Pines with her husband Chris, son Casen & black lab Bitty. She's been obsessed with all things mamma since her son was born in September of 2015 and is hopeful that the honesty in her blog posts will help new mamas!


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